Thursday, April 8

Sex on the First Internet Date

So I get a second message from a guy I sort of kept my eye on, though it took him a little longer than I expected for him to get back to me. I'd say it was about a week between his first and second message to me.

I was surprised to hear from him 'cause it's not like I really had been thinking about him. I was also pleasantly surprised 'cause of yet another nice picture of himself that he sent to me. ;)

He basically states that he's 'surprised' at how many women on the site were just looking for sex! I mean he wrote it in a way that sounded like he's not at all that impressed to get 'offers'. (I'm thinking other guys would KILL to not be able to complain about this, heh, heh.)

Don't think I'm naive to think some guys wouldn't be 'playing it up'. I know better. ;) Let's just assume that it wasn't his thing. I actually find it appealing when a guy expresses his interest in wanting to meet women for more than the physical pleasures! Perhaps I'm a 'typical' woman. ;)

Naturally I was curious by what he meant and told him that I was also surprised that a lot of women seemed to be looking for no strings action on the site. I mean he's an attractive guy. He doesn't post his pictures up, instead gives them privately.

Anyways we messaged back and forth and he said how he recently 'caved in' to a woman that was a master at the art of seduction. Curious me asked for details and oh boy, did I ever get them!

Let's just say that a first date dinner with someone he met online led to him going back to her place and getting attacked. I use the word 'attacked' 'cause he wasn't sounding like a willing recipient, rather someone that was giving in to a woman wanting and initiating sex!
Anyways, our banter was kind of fun, but it got me thinking.

How many of the guys that I went on dates with were just as 'attacked'? Is online dating and first date sex more common than I thought? Is it more women than men expecting - initiating - attacking - seeking out sex with someone they JUST met through online dating?!

Then it's almost like a call for some statistics went out to the Gods 'cause what do I find...

A survey regarding some online dating survey stats and boy was I sort of taken aback.

You see, I didn't think that online dating and first date sex was any more prevalent than first date sex where two people met the traditional way.

I was shocked to find out that 1 in 3 women who meet men online have SEX on the FIRST encounter!

It just seemed so high. Can the same be said that 1 out of 3 women who meet men OFFline have a one-night stand? Or is it something about the world of the Internet that is causing people to be more promiscuous?

My assumption would be that women would be more likely to have sex on the first encounter with a guy they met in the bar or at a party or something like that - rather than with a guy they met online out for coffee or dinner.

Usually when a woman meets a guy out when she's partying, she's having some drinks to help her relax, her friends are helping her feel confident, she's getting to know the guy, there's body language and all that good jazz that helps her feel the guy out.

But before an online dating first date there was what?? Emails, Messages, Maybe the phone. And unless the first date had drinks involved or she was just naturally comfortable - the connection would be much slower than that which you would create at a party.

Or would it?

These survey results surprised me. Not only is sex happening frequently using online dating, but it sounds like many women are into having sex with a man they just met - online.

4 out of 5 women do NOT use protection surveys reveal!

And if this is the case, which I'm hoping this survey where I'm getting this data from is some kind of hoax, it tells you just how far someone is willing to go with a 'stranger'. And stupidly at that to risk their own health (guys too!).

Then I got wondering if every 3rd guy I date has had online dating first date sex. I've never been good at math. But if it takes that THIRD girl to get sex on the first encounter then isn't that saying it takes every THIRD guy as well?!

And if 4 out of 5 encounters were between people possibly spreading around STD's, doesn't that mean that 80% of the guys I date from online perhaps have an STD?!

Somebody please enlighten me...

-xo Kat

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