Going From Online to Offline: When Do I Ask Her Out on a First Date?

So you're chatting it up with a woman online. She gets your jokes. She seems down to earth. You want to ask her out on a date, but you're not sure if it's too soon. You don't want to scare her away, but at the same time you don't want another guy swooping in. When is a good time to ask her out on a first date?

It depends on how much of a connection you have already. This could happen within the same day of chatting, or it could take longer.

There are some women that understandably need to get good vibes from a man they are talking to online, before they would be open to meeting up. Other women are much more spontaneous and even if they're unsure about the guy they've been talking to, they will agree to get to know him more in person.

If you've been having a back and forth conversation with a woman online and you feel it's time to meet her in person, you have to gauge her comfort level with you. If you find the conversation flows easily and she's been pretty active and timely in messaging you, then it may be the right time to ask her out.

When asking her out, keep it casual and low-key. You don't want her to smell desperation. If she says she wants to meet you, but she's busy then don't give up. Ask what day works for her. Or ask her out again the next time you talk.

If a woman has no intention of meeting you in person, she won't necessarily come right out and say it. Instead, she will make excuses. She may enjoy talking to you and the attention you're giving her, but she's not into you enough to want to meet up with you.

And that's okay, there are tons of connections that don't happen for one reason or another. She probably thinks you're cool, but there isn't enough of a spark. Don't waste your time. Move onto someone who is really excited about you, and looks forward to meeting you.

-xo Kat

Get Better Luck with Women Online - A Simple Yet Effective Tip

I write a lot about online dating profiles. It kind of reminds me of how you would want that perfect resume to impress those employers. You want that perfect dating online profile to impress all those women.

The profile is a very important part of the online dating process, whether you are looking for women to message you first, or you want them to reply back to your messages.

Not to mention the online matchmaking sites won't let you proceed until you have your profile up and running, and they usually require a minimum amount of sentences on your profile.

If you're coming up blank on what to write on your first profile for online dating, or maybe you feel you need to change it up for better results with women - it pays to take a look at sample dating profiles. 

How you can do this is by setting your search options to look at male profiles. Yup. This will give you some great ideas - on what to do and more importantly what not to do.

The more you're looking to attract beautiful and desirable women online, the more you have to step it up on creating a great profile.

Focus on creating a perfect profile and interesting emails to entice women online.

-xo Kat

12 BAD Online Dating Profile Headlines

Okay, maybe you've been on a matchmaking site already and have taken a look around at women's profiles. If you have, surely you've come across some plain, unique, interesting and boring headlines for online dating.

I wanted to share some of my own headlines, from my own dating online adventures.

So without further ado, I present to you Kat's Collection Of Guys' *REAL* online dating profile headlines - Here is the countdown from least worst to most worst, and with my own commentary to boot! :)


12. Life's a garden. Dig it?

I don't nhoe.

11. Never play leap frog with a unicorn

Thank you for the warning, I almost went ahead with my plans.

10. Dust bunnies breed like rabbits

Really? I thought it was just a bunch of dust.

9. The odds are good, but the goods are odd

Nah, I think just odd.

8. If I'm on this it's probably laundry day

How many pairs of underwear do you need to go through everyday??

7. Male seeks female

This one definitely needs to have the copyright symbol next to it.

6. Looking for good-hearted man

Fair enough, but you do know you're browsing for chicks, right?

5. I am not certified to remove asbestos

Shucks, and I was just about to message you.

4. I might not be too cute...but my dog is

I might not be too cute, but my grandma is.

3. I'm on a horse

Please tell me this is some kind of movie reference, 'cause I don't see a picture with a horse, and even if I did...

2. Happy birthday to the ground

Please will someone make friends with him. Pleeaaase.

1. Constructor of temporary erections

Better something than nothing...I guess.

What did you guys think? Would you have ranked it differently? Commented differently?

-xo Kat

Is Your Internet Dating Profile Good Enough?

Your Internet dating profile is such an important part of the online dating process! Don't take for granted the 'art' of writing an online dating profile.

It's not as simple as slopping together a few words with improper grammar and spelling errors, throwing an old pic up of a barely decipherable human face, and some boring headline.

Women are not just looking at WHAT you are saying, but also HOW you are choosing to say what you want to say. i.e. Are you writing your profile to 'one' woman or are you writing to the 'ladies'?

They are not just looking at WHAT you look like, rather HOW you choose to present yourself through pictures. i.e. Are you goofing off in your photos, or do you look more mature?

Remember, you DO have competition. Don't assume that she will fall for you, if she just gives you a chance to have a conversation, or a meet up in person.

If you don't impress with your profile for dating online right from the get go, you won't have much luck getting out of the gate.

-xo Kat

How to: Dating Online 'Cause It's Fun!

Just like anything you try for the first time, you have both feelings of excitement and apprehension.

You are looking forward to trying out something that you haven't done before, especially if this is something that you think will give you a thrill.

At the same time, you are hesitant 'cause you don't know what to expect.

When I first started the whole dating online thing, I didn't know what to expect.

I didn't even want to put a picture of myself up 'cause like with swimming you want to dip your toes in to check the temperature of the water first.

I was excited to meet people, in a way that I hadn't before. But also, I was nervous at the stigma that dating online brought.

Because I wasn't taking the concept of going on the Internet to meet guys too seriously, I was able to be more relaxed with my approach.

Had I signed-up to a matchmaking site thinking that I wanted to find a boyfriend, I don't think I would have had the courage to start out.

Usually when you lower your expectations for something that you are anticipating, the outcome is better than what would have been.

How many times have you worked yourself up in the past thinking that you would have a great night, a great trip, or whatever - only to discover that you didn't have as much fun as you had hoped for?

On the contrary, if you don't think about how much fun you will have, and just go with the flow, you usually have a way better time than you could have imagined.

Online dating works the same way.

If you go into it with an open mind, and not with an agenda, not only will you have a better experience - but you will also face less online dating rejection by women.

Usually when you are disappointed with an experience, it's because you had somewhat of an agenda already made-up in your mind.

So hey -

No expectations, no stigma, all fun,

Okay?!

-xo Kat

3 Steps to Asking Her Out Online

If you've been chatting it up with a woman online, it may be time to ask her out for that anticipatory dating online first date. After all, you're probably not just looking for online pen pals.

However, knowing the RIGHT time for when to ask out a woman from online dating is crucial. Do it too SOON or in the wrong WAY, and you won't get your chance to meet her.

There are NO shortcuts when it comes to asking a woman out from online dating. You must execute every step or you'll be stuck at a dead end.

If it sounds like you only get one chance to ask her out, often times that's all she'll give you!

To meet a woman in person that you met online, follow these 3 steps to get her to agree to a dating online first date:

1. Get Her Attention

This seems obvious, and that's because it is.

You have to start-up a conversation with a woman first. Even if she was the one that messaged you first, she will probably wait for you to ask her out.

Sure there are many women that ask a guy out first. But the women that are truly desirable, they don't need to ask men out. Nor do they want to.

To get these types of women that other men want, you have to get her attention.

This is why you have to have an awesome profile and kill it with your first message, and subsequent ones!

2. Build Trust and Rapport

Women know that there are many creeps online. It only takes one negative experience with a weirdo to get their guard up. In this sense, you have to reassure her that you're just a normal, nice guy.

Coming out and saying you're NOT crazy sort of raises red-flags. It's because she will wonder why you thought to say that. It's best to avoid stating things in a negative way, and to highlight your strengths instead.

Treat her like you would one of your girl friends. Act like a gentleman and she will know she can trust you. Develop rapport over some good conversation.

Knowing how to attract and chat with women online, will not only have you talking to tons of women, but they will also agree to meet with you!

3. Move Things Offline Smoothly

There's nothing worst than the smell of desperation. And women can smell this from a mile away. No one likes someone that is over-eager.

Take things at a smooth place. Let her believe you're a desirable guy and not just waiting for the FIRST person that comes along and takes an interest in you.

This is why not rushing into asking her out is so important. But you don't want to wait too long either, otherwise she will think you're not interested enough.

She also wants to feel special, and not like she's just some girl on a list. You won't know what is unique about her, unless you chat with her.

You have to give her the impression that there is something about HER, that is making you want to get to know her more. And not that she is a living and breathing pulse.

You have to get a feel for the right time to ask her to go from online to offline. With experience, this will come to you more naturally.

If you follow these 3 steps for when to ask women online out on a date, you will be in a MUCH better position to get them to say YES to meeting you.

After all, isn't the whole excitement about online dating, the chance to meet NEW and COOL women that you normally wouldn't get to meet in your day-to-day?

Get out there!

-xo Kat

3 Tips for Attracting Women Online

It is so important when creating a dating profile for Internet matchmaking sites that you do not fib. What's the point?

Don't think you can wine and dine the woman you are taking out, and that she won't notice that you are actually 5 years older, 4 inches shorter, and 10 pounds bigger than your profile stated!

Women do it too, don't get me wrong, usually with their weight.

How would you feel if you met someone whose pictures were a little deceiving, or they even s-t-r-e-t-c-h-e-d the truth just a little?

Would you 'fall' for her in person, ignoring the fact that she held back something of importance? Or would you feel sort of deceived, and wonder what else she was not being truthful about?

You see, you lose more than you gain (pun not intended) when you aren't honest with someone from the get go.

Trust is very important to women, and if you start off with a little lie or lie by omission, they will wonder what else you have up your sleeve.

Not to mention, people like confidence and when you fib, you show that you're not comfortable enough with who you are.

You don't want to meet someone that you have interest in, only to find out that had you been honest with her in the first place, she would have given you a shot!

Least of all be called a jerk!

I was chatting it up with one guy that was actually 4 years older than his stated age.

But what bothered me more is that he never brought it up!

I only knew that he was older than what he stated 'cause I recognized him from the same site a couple of years earlier!

Let's just say he was embarrassed when I called him on it, and I was turned off that he wasn't confident enough to be straight-up.

I asked him why he went about online dating that way and he said exactly what I thought - he was trying to appeal to younger women.

I totally understand, but we didn't end up going through with our date. No, thanks.

Another guy I went on a date with ended up being shorter than the height stated in his profile - we're talking like 3 inches! I mean I was literally towering over him in heels. Sheesh!

The moral of the story is:

1) Have an honest profile - The write-up and the pictures.

2) If you fib a LITTLE in your profile, at least let her know the truth soon into the conversation - Before you meet in person is better.

2) Be opened minded in your search criteria - You never know who you could meet.

I came across an article stating 8 or 9 out of 10 people lie in their profile for dating online!

As I mentioned, typically men exaggerate their height and women under-report their weight.

It's supposedly subtle differences that you wouldn't notice in-person.

But heck, I notice!

What do you think? Is it okay to lie on your profile for dating online? What is acceptable? What isn't?

-xo Kat

How NOT to Deal with Online Dating Rejection

I don't know about you guys, but if you're anything like me...rejection just plain sucks!

Getting rejected by women when online dating kind of gets to your ego, 'cause it's not like they even REALLY know who you are.

They don't know how you are around your family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, etc.

And you KNOW this, but you can't help but let the sting get to your ego.

Sound familiar?

Then dealing with rejection from women when online dating has you hold back, when you shouldn't even let it get to you!

I was recently messaging back and forth with some guy online.

Things were going well with conversation, so I decided to add him to my Facebook.

I don't like to add people from online dating onto Facebook, and that is just my own personal choice.

So with this one guy, I guess I was feeling risque, lol, by adding him.

As I checked out his profile on there, I noticed that I wasn't as interested as I thought I would be.

I recognized a girl that I saw on the online dating site we both use (yes, I sometimes check out women's profiles, out of curiousity!), and was thinking, Woah! If he added her, then we're definitely not a match. Her personality and mine are miles apart.

Not to mention, I wasn't into his style of conversation with others. As I checked out his 'wall', I wasn't too impressed with how he talks 'cool'. Not my thing.

Sooo, because I realized I wouldn't be interested in him, I decided to take him off as a Facebook 'friend'.

I didn't get a chance to message him about it, before he sent me a message saying he noticed. I then go to send a message to explain and found out he had blocked me.

Well, to make a bit longer of a story shorter - let's just say, this guy took the meaning 'crazy' to a whole new level. ;)

He just could NOT handle the rejection.

Basically, he came up with a really LOW type of insult. He kept messaging me insults, and even when I blocked him, he created a new account online JUST so he could bash me!

And the weird part about it is that he was trying to add me back on as a 'friend'. How does somebody put you down, and still want to know you? Weird.

Anyways, he finally went away.

Phew. lol

-xo Kat

Online Dating Tip For Men - Your Profile IS Important

Hey guys,

Your profile for dating online is pretty standard across all matchmaking sites.

You definitely don't want to take this part of the online dating experience lightly.

Think what matters most are your pics?

Think again.

You may focus on what women look like, before considering if you should contact them. However, women look beyond the pictures.

They are interested in WHO you are as a person, and this is conveyed in your profile, or lack thereof.

Don't lose out on an opportunity to have all those women contact you, simply because you chose not to spend those extra few minutes refining your profile.

Even worst, think a woman will respond back simply 'cause of what you wrote in that first message to her? Nope, she will take your profile into consideration too!

Don't underestimate the power of a good profile for dating online.

-xo Kat

Ashley Madison Consumer Reviews

If you haven't already heard of Ashley 'Cheating' Madison, she is not necessarily your girl next door type. She is becoming very popular to men and even women...well, some women anyway.

She's extremely recognizable and very trusted. She is definitely unique. She is married and definitely looking. And so is everyone else that is using her.

If you haven't already heard of Ashley 'Cheating' Madison, she is not necessarily your girl next door type. She is becoming very popular to men and even women...well, some women anyway.

She's extremely recognizable and very trusted. She is definitely unique. She is married and definitely looking. And so is everyone else that is using her.

You see, Ashley Madison is not just one woman - it is an online dating service targeting married people that want an affair with other married folks. A married dating service for attached men and woman looking to have an extra-marital affair, boasting over 5 million worldwide users. Heck, you can even be single to join.

Ashley Madison has been featured on Oprah, Larry King, 20/20, Ellen, Dr. Phil and Howard Stern. Despite advertising for the site being banned from the Super Bowl and Toronto streetcars, it doesn't fail to get members to its site.

With the slogan 'Life is Short, Have an Affair', it's as if it guilt's you into seeking fulfillment in an area of your life that you seemingly have no control over. Whether you are a man looking for a married woman or for a woman that wants a sugar daddy, the site 'guarantees' an affair.

Never mind selecting long walks on the beach, or meeting up for coffee as interests, rather the site has 'skinny dipping' and a 'secret love nest' as the least risque interest choices on the site.

Though online dating sites can't really guarantee an online affair, the service is expanding worldwide. In fact, the Ashley Madison CEO's goal is to have 100,000,000 million members.

What causes people to seek out an affair? What causes people to get involved with those already attached?

Whenever a man (as this is a blog for men) seeks the excitement of sex outside his own marriage, cheating becomes part of that scenery. If you get caught up in 'fantasy-land' and get out of touch with the 'real-world', you inevitably choose to delve into risky business.

Whatever happened to good old-fashioned marital values? Communication is something that can be learned. Passion can be re-built.

How about looking into your wife's eyes and asking her, "How can we build our passion back up?" Is this too boring nowadays?

I'm not married, but I do hope I would find someone that would naturally turn to me for his sexual desires and his frustrations. I would want someone that could tell me everything about what he is thinking and feeling, so I could try and provide for him.

Often times cheating isn't about the sex, and this is something that I hope my partner would be willing to share with me also. I believe in prevention over treatment.

I know as a single woman, I would never go for a man that was attached. I wouldn't respect a man that would be willing to cheat on his partner. He would just do the same thing to me. My self-esteem is high enough that I don't need to infiltrate on a woman's relationship with her man. Let alone if there are children involved.

There are enough single people out there. I say work on your marriage, or get out.

Maybe I'm just old-fashioned.

As always, I'd love to know what you think!

-xo Kat